D3 body, D1 cock
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
