btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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