If i come over, it means nothing
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
