this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
