I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize