you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
