Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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