Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
