I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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