he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
