Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
