No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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