sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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