Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
