i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
