She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I love you. Go after that dick
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