It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
