You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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