she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
