I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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