you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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