Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you win again, gameday.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
