You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
