Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize