I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
