love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
