he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
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