I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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