Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
