you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
