ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize