If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
