Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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