Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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