No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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