From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
