On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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