Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Randomize
