I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
