let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize