Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
