As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
