We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
After tacos, we're chasing women.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
