A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
