I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Acid is not a monday night drug
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
