I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
