Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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