So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
