i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
