worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
