where does the pee come out of this thing
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
